Tag Archives: Life

Kevin at a Desk

For the Love of the Sox

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They are the team that gets you up in the morning.

This team will take you on a wild ride, through the dog days of summer and into the fall classic. Then just as you are about comfortable with the team, they break your heart.

They are the heart breakers those Boston Red Sox, but it is a pain that we fans put up with every year.

I am part of the lucky generation, the generation where i only had to endure 10 of the 86 year “Curse of the Bambino” and had the 2003 season to cry over.

Yes, there is crying in baseball.

What the Sox mean to us is more than any other sports team in the world has, its the ability to define the odds and break the odds in 2. Like the American spirit, we may get things thrown at us and our odds dwindle, but we find a way some how to keep moving on. Its in our blood. That doesn’t mean there isn’t room for heartbreak

Growing up in part of the heart of Boston, you grow up a Red Sox fan.

Period. End of Story.

Unless of course your parents grew up somewhere else and you fall into their fandom. As a kid, you dream of going to the Red Sox games, just walking up the tunnel your first time is something to behold. I can remember the first time my father took me to a baseball game. The smell of the stands, the crackerjacks, the loud sounds of the bat hitting the ball, its just a magical timeless act. You dream of catching a foul ball and you just take everything in. Every little thing about the Sox can affect your life, Especially after a heart breaking trade (looking at you Nomar).

As you get older, you analyze the game more and your favorite player changes over time and you become truly anointed into Red Sox Nation. The in depth Podcast (Section 10 in the Building!) and the old time classic players transitioning to the analysis broadcast teams, you really start to look at the small details, the averages, the on base percentage, the nitty gritty stats.  You become more aware and go in-depth and engulfed in the game and it stings even more when you have to wait for opening day the next year no matter the result. We even skip work or pull our kids out of school for a day just to see a game in the brisk spring days. Honestly, Boston and all of New England should have opening day off, or at least a half day.RedSox1

What the Sox can mean is a lot more than just a baseball team.

The Red Sox have been a centralized landmark in Boston’s culture for over 100 years. When we have personal tragedy, triumph, or rough days at work, the Red Sox are always a way we can connect generations and bring back good times and fond memories.The games and the team have  always been a staple even in Boston’s darkest hour. During the recovery after the Boston Marathon Bombings, the team became a sign of hope and healing. From the Boston Strong Motto that we still use, to the honoring of the first respondents. Even Big Papi’s speech was healing. In Boston’s cathedral of Fenway Park,  we came together to find some sort of regularity, something we as a city could find that could relieve the horrors of the times and get a smile on our bleak faces. The season led to the top, culminating in the world series being won at Fenway for the first time in 95 years. Indescribable.

The Sox are Boston’s baby boys, the talking points (either good or bad talk), the toast of the town.

We love them, because they are us. They are the working men and women of America just in a different uniform. They represent what we hold dear in our values and our hard work and determination. Even if they get knocked down and banged around, they still get up on their feet and keep moving forward.

Now, on the cusp of the 2018 ALCS win we have a chance once again to take the crown, and look forward to another title in Title-town USA. Don’t expect we will act like we have been here before; I still think all of Boston will be on the edge of their seats, screaming at the TV and saying their Hail Mary’s, even with experience under our belts and even going into the World Series with one of the best teams assembled since 2013, there will always be a nervous overtone to Red Sox Nation.

Its just the reminisce of a lost curse that stung for too long.

Just Post Grad Things, Kevin at a Desk

Get Up and Get Out

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Have you ever had a real adventure?

The type that you get to experience a new thing or see a different way of life? It is exhilarating when you get to travel especially in your 20’s. You don’t have a lot that ties you down or keeps you from the adventures of the world, except one major thing…

We don’t have a lot of Money to our name.

WE are scrapping for every penny that comes our way to pay debt off or to just keep our heads afloat in a broken market. Its difficult to take the time for us to explore and get to experience new cultures and new things on a budget. What i think is that you need to take time for yourself and be free of work, however you don’t need to go that far abroad to experience something new. I think its time we explore our own country before we get our passports and start practicing our really bad Italian.

The United States has so much to offer and you don’t even need a big budget to explore the states. You honestly need a car, a few good friends and a little bit of time (Both to travel and time off from work). In my life i have been able to explore the entire Eastern seaboard and the Gulf Coast all by driving with family. We were able to experience the southern cuisine, the nightlife, the experience of not freezing in the winter (Thanks Louisiana) and basically getting me out of my comfort zone very early on in life. I know there are numerous other places in the United States i want to go to, like the Midwest to go see pond Hockey, or the southwest to see the Grand Canyon, or even more of California to catch the legendary Rose Bowl game (and maybe even the rose bowl parade). The point is there are so many different states we can venture to without even leaving the states.

However, i think going abroad young is still unique because there is some certain excitement traveling abroad by yourself for the first time.

If you are looking for a different point of view, going abroad is your answer, it is just in my opinion that you should rethink where you go o. Go somewhere where not every 20 something goes like Ireland and Italy (or at least go for a different reason than to be a drunk American abroad)be different and avoid the tourist traps. Go some where in Europe like Germany or Poland, Finland, Iceland, etc somewhere it is uncommon to travel to, somewhere that you don’t hear traditional american tourist like to huddle around. I hope to, in the near future, to go over to Europe and go into the northern parts like Norway and Sweden, i think that’s the right way around for a guy like me. However, i still think you should go to places like Ireland and Italy, just not for the reason of getting hammered. Learn the culture the history the reason they are who they are today. Especially if you descend from the countries, make it a heritage walk and learn from your families past.

All in all you don’t need to spend money to make a good vacation or time away you can enjoy it close to home.

Just make the effort to get up and get out

Kevin at a Desk

Golden Days

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For these golden days, in old fashion

The winds are blowing again

It’s rattling the leaves, shaking them free of their rooted shackles

Falling ever so graciously to the frosted ground that will soon be frozen in time.

They lay there and are sentenced to the end.

As a child i have always wondered why the colors were so vibrant

Such a True Red always caught my eye and never let me look away,

Never letting me go through

Now that the cycle begins again,

The beauty of looking into the day with colors so vibrant makes a work life dole bearable.

The world is windy now a days, gone is the satisfying breeze.

The days are full of cold rain delays and phases of haze

The colors are not vibrant today

I can not see my reds, golds, and the rare orange.

But i still hold out hope to see the winds change sooner than never

I hear others are starting to notice they can’t see the leaves now

I wonder if they ever saw them as i did, or is this their first time noticing their faceless beauty?

The other day i noticed something,

A warmer breeze rushed over the land, clearing the haze

I was taken aback from this and started to shout to the others to come see,

but they said it was too cold and the haze was not gone

I sense the winds are changing, i have seen it coming 

Seems like warmer breezes lay upon the horizon for some

while others shall need a jacket.

Kevin at a Desk

I am a Cynic

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 cyn·i·cal 

  1. believing that people are motivated by self-interest; distrustful of human sincerity or integrity.

I got called a cynic in my college freshman year theology class by oddly enough one of my favorite professors ever. “Mr. Gill, the cynic” he said to the class. I like the ring to that, but i really did not think that i was a cynic and until in recent years it has grown on me because well;

I agree with it.

I am a proud cynic because i have lost faith.  I lost faith in people when it became apparent to me that motives beat out mankind’s desire to help thy neighbor. We put our own gains above the needs that are mattering the most in this world. I am just sick of it and i doubt what can be true or what can be used for gain. It seems like nothing i true an even tho you are my comrade, i think your motives will promote you and damage me. The other aspect of being a cynic is we keep the world honest. WE do not take the world at face value, we want evidence, we want all the things that can make something worth it so we can be the judge of it. Sometime things can get passed off too quickly because they look good and not realistic. That is not how this works, that’s not how any of this works. You have to be realistic and not give the people bs.

I guess you can say its a bad way to look at humanity and its similar to looking through dirty glasses, the picture isn’t all that clear. You can say the fact that i need to look on the brighter side of life or i need to get a attitude change. Maybe that’s a valid point or maybe you are not seeing what i am saying.

I do not look for the bad in people, i just believe 9/10 they do selfish things. I feel as if they do not want to mutually succeed with the rest of humanity. Like how hard is it to be honest and sincere to each other? If we were better at this i don’t think i would be so cynical of this world. I don’t see enough of the selfless acts and i understand that not all is seen, but why do we hide these acts? Why not do something nice in the open so all can see. You don’t need a medal or a key to the city in thanks, but we can start to express gratitude in simplistic ways. I am a cynic because i have seen people who say they would do anything for someone but when i ask for help i get sent through the metaphorical wringer to get a sliver of what i gave earlier. I don’t stand the fakers. My opinion will not be lenient people suck. I am not perfect, i will be first to call my imperfections out but calling yourself a saint does not cleanse you of the sin. You cant say things and let down on your word. Its all you have in this world.

To say the least, i am the happiest man when i get proven wrong. Its what we want to be, is proven wrong. I love to be proven wrong by something that upstages my cynicism about people. “Did that person really return that money? they did, wow.” Something along the lines of that is great or when we get a upstanding politician in the world for a change. (Thanks Norm). When you can prove a cynic wrong, i like to think you corrupt our perception of the world. Which in this case is a good thing. I think it should be a thing to actively try and corrupt cynics. It makes the world a little better. We are the ones who have lost faith, lost trust in sincerity, and it should be society who brings us back into a different mindset. Until that happens, ill sit in my rocking chair and just try to trust again but ill enjoy my cup cynicism in the morning because its what taste best to me.

Kevin at a Desk

Let’s Talk

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” I hope you are doing well and i hope to hear from you soon, just remember if you need anything, let me know”

Common words spoken lead to actions that are common I guess?

It’s Mental Health awareness week, and it is the reminder of the fact that you are not alone in this world. In your darkest hour, there will be candles lit for you to follow every mile you walk. You may feel out of place, like being on a deserted island in your own mind and yet you have a person on each shoulder waiting for you to say the word and guide you to the mainland. It’s a fact

The fact is that 1 in 5 people will experience mental health problems in their lifetime. That’s about 43 million people in the United States for my mathematicians out there. It’s a big number and we are starting to realize the impact of mental conditions such as anxiety, depression, and others but some to say the least. I can tell you that seeing the number for the first time was very disheartening and concerning. What was going on? why was this so high and what are we doing? I like to think these are the first questions we contemplate over the first few times we rationalize the impossible. I think the question does stand still whenever we contemplate it because we think this is a solvable problem overnight, or at least we wish it was. The fact is that we are breaking the stigma around the talks we should be having concerning mental health.

The conversation is never easy, never fun, and it gets hard when you have to ask your closest friend. Just because you are afraid to have the conversation about mental health does not make you a weak person.

If we had this conversation mastered, then we would know the secrets to the universe as well.

These conversations are hard for a lot of us, and those who may have them on a daily basis or are at least trained for them it gets harder each person they talk with. Each story they hear, each ounce of pain weighed, every discussion has its impact upon everyone who is involved in the conversation. Sometimes it gets to us hearing so many stories,m and we need to have the conversation about ourselves. Anyone from a friend to a therapist can be someone that can be a listening ear for those who need help. We forget sometimes that those who help with mental health do not do enough for themselves and their well being. Even myself, where in my profession we are considered as people who can hear stories and help those out who are dealing with mental health.

Sometimes I just wish that i could be as good to myself as i am for others.

I do not treat myself very well. I do not seek help, i do not ask, and i suffer for it. I know my resources to the letter, i know what is there i just can not bring myself to “Burden” others even the ones who get paid to do this as a job. I think when i think of mental health i want to think of others first and put mine off to the side until it overflows like boiling pot of water. Until it gets there i do not pay attention to it, maybe a sad song will fix it, and that’s not right and i know it, you know it, everyone knows it. Its been my mission over the past two years to get my head on straight and try and keep it there. I have made progress but its a journey not a trip. Good days stay and bad days come and go.

We write a lot on this blog about adulthood, especially the millennial generations cause well we are them. IN this generation mental health has become a foreground discussion and we are going to be the generation that breaks the stigma around the “IT” or our mental health. I just know it. What we will struggle with is the realization is that the helpers do not help themselves. The helpers will put off everything until it goes too far and “boils over.”

We need to get better at the fact that we matter as well as others.

If we can make common actions happen then the words to spur those soon to be common conversations on our view on mental health would change. This week should be about others but in reality you matter just the same, we love you and its OK to have a conversation about you. It’s what matters the most.

Just Post Grad Things

The Fortnite Obsession (and why it needs to stop)

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Trigger Warning: If you consider yourself someone who has an intimate relationship with Fortnite – and or are simply and radically addicted, read no further.

Yet another thing Ruined

A decade ago the term fortnight was one that regarded a fourteen (fort) night period of time or two weeks, but last year Epic Games changed that with the creation of their video game “Fortnite”.

Yet another thing #ruined by the #millenialage. (Click here for We ruin everything, apparently)

A Never Ending Fad…

Widely played and highly addictive Fortnite became a huge success almost overnight [rather than in a fortnight] – but personally, I can’t understand why…

As I stand I would currently deem myself a part-time gamer – only able to dedicate 5 – 8 hours a week to my console, but rarely if at all will I dedicate that time to Fortnite because I personally see no value in the game.

Unlike Call of Duty which has a historical timeline, Mario which is timeless (and I wish Nintendo could share the wealth with other consoles), and sports games like FIFA or NHL which have been around 5ever – Fortnite has nothing more than bright colors wacky dances,  and brain melting concepts.

Quick facts :

  • the graphics are weak – especially with a 4k system because  there are so many games where the graphics and experience are so much better
  • the building mode is overrated – and Call of Duty did it better
  • the dances are lame – and yet people live for them???
  • and don’t get me started on how my friend (while playing with his girlfriend) pushed her around in a shopping cart and then threw her off a cliff… talk about #relationshipgoals?

So when will Fortnite go nighty night… I don’t know but I sure hope it doesn’t last much longer because I am pretty sick and tired of hearing about it. pexels-photo

Kevin at a Desk

Up in Smoke

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In too many drinks, deeper and deeper i tread

The room becomes pressurized with the flow of alcohol fueled, anxiety driven young people.

I cant stand the choking, the haze that i am in

I push my way out of the crowd as if hiding in plain sight

That wasn’t my scene,  no director was telling me to restart that one.

As i walk towards the dimly lit bench hidden by a hill

I open up my package of cigarettes,

Flick open the old lighter that my grandfather gave me

The one that saw so many tragedies

It has a scar that runs from the top of the lighter all the way down its spine

You need to turn the flint a couple of times for it to light

A lights so warm you forget of the troubles

I guess it takes after its owners.

The tobacco touches the tip of the torch,

And the crackle of the chemicals cringes my lungs

but its how i breath,

its how i fly

I know this is how i end up in the ground unannounced

But the smoke clears my mind, relieves what i can not hold in

Maybe in a cloud of uncertainty, 

With the booze bringing in the nightmares

i am just trying to smoke them out.

 

 

 

Fitness and Wellness

couples who work out together

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couples who work out together

I won’t lie, I am jealous of those staged videos [you know the ones]. Where a couple [generally a male and female] are getting fit together and barely look like they are breaking a sweat. THIS IS NOT REALISTIC.
Often times I will be scrolling through my social accounts and these videos will pop up. I immediately am overcome with jealousy because [wow] and because I would love to find a man like this, but again. It is not realistic.
To the couples that do this, I have no doubt that you share a special kind of bond, but as for the rest of us… when you see me running just look the other way because it will not be pretty.

Kevin at a Desk

I wish I Had Known

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If I had known what was going wrong,

I would have been there

 

If I had seen what you were feeling,

the winds around would have spun me a tornado strong enough to save you

and I would have taken a whole barn out of its place to find you, comfort you.

 

These days I am more angry than sad

No longer able to stand knowing what happens to good people.

But Of course, I am late to the funeral, And it seems to be a trend.

And God! it burns a hole in my head!

Because I would have done something, anything,

If only

And I wish I knew how you are feeling, even though I’ll never comprehend it

And I wish I knew what goes on in your thoughts when the darkness seeps neath closed doors and windows,

And even if you do not want it –

I will try to hold a candle out for you to take. To burn away what hate hath break –

 

You see

When the time comes I just hope someone can hold me back

And tie me up in the thickest of chains,

For if this ever happens to someone I care about, I will hunt them till the ends of the earth

 

And you may pray that an Earthly force will hold me back.

But Even I doubt that.

 

Now I can take some sort of stand to amend for my sins

Even though they do not stain my own soul.

 

 

May God have my back,

May you have my reason

May I never again not know 

How you are Doing.

 

 

 

Kevin at a Desk

A Dedication to the Comic Strip

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It has been in the Sunday Newspaper for more than a century.

Its part of a daily routine for many people to sit with a cup of coffee, tea, etc and read the funnies to themselves for a good chuckle to begin their day. As recent years has slowly bled the ink out of the newspaper industry, websites have started to develop pages solely dedicated to the art of the comic strip. You can sign up, get a personalized page with all your favorite comics and never really second guess the idea of finding them. Its a nice, relaxing read.

I do not think our generation finds these types of comics to be as entertaining or funny as the older generations have in the past. We want the instant gratification of the laugh without thinking hard into what the comic is really offering to the reader. There are some comic strips that you need to be ready to read between the lines to understand like the comic Dilbert. Others have references that we do not understand because the joke is not meant for us and even after an explanation of the joke, its just lost its touch to us and we keep looking for another comic. Now, why would i want to dedicate this piece to a dying art form? Its because the comic strip has shaped a lot before i was born and in my young life as well.

Comics are my dads pride and joy. Period

He loved reading them on a day off from working in downtown Boston as a FedEx driver. On his weekends, he would not do anything in the morning until he either read the paper for comics or boot up the laptop to read his funnies. He loves these things. To his credit, its how he communicates with a lot of people, including me. We had a family friend named Jack Dillon who got dad’s humor to a tee. While Jack was able, both of them would cut out comics from the newspaper and snail mail it with a ” Hello and you will get a kick out of this” type letter. Basically until jack died in 2011, he still sent a funny or two a month that lifted both his and dads spirits up. What many do not know is Jack was a father figure to my dad for many years, i consider him a grandfather figure to me because i was treated like a grandson for many years. This is one of the reasons my dad loves comic strips, it brings back Jack for at least a moment of joy. My dad will always send comics out to people that he knows either through himself or even some of my aquatints. He will send me a link to send to my guidance counselor or my history professor or even my boss. They are always funny.

I picked up on my dad’s love of comics.

I always enjoy a good comic in the paper or on a website. Its classic humor and never gets old, usually sticks with the times. The first comic i picked up was when i was 10-12 years old. It was a collection of Calvin and Hobbes comics over the years and i never put them down. I collected a lot of books over the years of Calvin and Hobbes adventures, hands down are my favorite comic. A boy who is basically a maniac, his tiger friend Hobbes who is a stuff animal, and his other supporting characters; sounds like me in a nutshell. Even to this day i always read the comic strip, follow the twitter account, and basically love anything associated with it.

Now there is one comic that is basically my life in a nutshell; Zits

No, its not about the skin irritation. Its about a teenage boy living in high school and living with his mom and dad. I kid you not this is basically about me and my parents. We legit always quote it or on every comic say along the lines of ” Yup that’s Kevin alright.” Many things that are exaggerated in the comic strip but i always get a chuckle when dad sends them along to me with the subject line of the email being something witty or at least he tries to be. I have explored on my own to see what other comics i enjoy. One of the predominate ones Pearls Before Swine has become one of my favorite comics. I can relate to the humor that he writes, it seems as if my dad and i write these things.

Essentially, Comics although considered a dying art connects generations.

My father and i share a bond with comics. Since i have grown up into a version of him, i sit on Sundays with my cup of coffee and i read the things he sent me over the week and laugh and give him a call to talk about the comics and laugh and see whats going on. Its a excellent conversation starter especially as he shares a passion of his with me and i have adopted it so well. I can tell you Sunday’s comics take a whole different meaning when you can enjoy them with someone else.

Just Post Grad Things, JustRachel

How my English Major Lead me to a Financial Health and Wellness Company

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Have you ever had a Dream 

One that felt so real – so illogically real – and yet suddenly you were living it.

It isn’t as simple as Deja Vu nor as complicated as being able to predict the future. It just simply is – and isn’t – everything your mind came up with while you were sleeping. 

I’m not saying I believe in magic – It isn’t that simple, but I do believe that we have a far greater capacity to understand trends and data than our waking minds can never comprehend. And like I said I don’t believe in magic – and miracles are only grim fairytales for those who have prayed and lost – but there is something beautiful about an impossible dream that makes me want to know more of what my future holds.

A year ago I was writing a novel

I could see the building burning, the cubicles up in flame. I could see the frantic look in his eye [the main character] when he realized the irony of an insurance company burning to the ground. I can remember the smell of Chinese food on this man’s desk and the legacy his father had built for him – and then a year later I found myself working for a company that looks at health, wellness, and finance – that talks about insurance every day – and suddenly everything was just like I had imagined it, only there was far less smoke.

Continue reading How my English Major Lead me to a Financial Health and Wellness Company →

Relationships

Dear Teenagers, ‘Adults’ and Americans

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This post contains content relating to sexual assault – the contents of this post are not graphic but may trigger some readers due to its stance. If you or someone you know has been affected or impacted by sexual assault call the National Assult Help Line at 1-800-656-4673 or go to Womenshealth.gov for help.

An aside: this post was inspired by multiple conversations I have seen on social media today. It features content that is heated and inspired by events that this writer has both seen and experienced.

That being said, if you see a friend who is struggling or in need, reach out. Talk to them and help them in any way you can.

As a young female, some of my writings blame males for events I have encountered but the fact of the matter is that men are not entirely to blame. While reported assaults suggest that more females are assaulted than males – there is also a population of males who are affected. As much as we want to genderize this issue – It is also important to recognize that we as people, as a society, and as human beings need to make a move to change the status quo and take claims of assault seriously.

The current administration in the United States is not doing a good job when it comes to protecting our young women – there should be a shrinking number of girls who say #metoo but instead, it continues to grow. If you or someone else is in need call the National Assult Help Line at 1-800-656-4673 or go to Womenshealth.gov

and know that you are not alone.

Continue reading Dear Teenagers, ‘Adults’ and Americans →