The Fortnite Obsession (and why it needs to stop)

Trigger Warning: If you consider yourself someone who has an intimate relationship with Fortnite – and or are simply and radically addicted, read no further.


Yet another thing Ruined

A decade ago the term fortnight was one that regarded a fourteen (fort) night period of time or two weeks, but last year Epic Games changed that with the creation of their video game “Fortnite”.

Yet another thing #ruined by the #millenialage. (Click here for We ruin everything, apparently)


A Never Ending Fad…

Widely played and highly addictive Fortnite became a huge success almost overnight [rather than in a fortnight] – but personally, I can’t understand why…

As I stand I would currently deem myself a part-time gamer – only able to dedicate 5 – 8 hours a week to my console, but rarely if at all will I dedicate that time to Fortnite because I personally see no value in the game.

Unlike Call of Duty which has a historical timeline, Mario which is timeless (and I wish Nintendo could share the wealth with other consoles), and sports games like FIFA or NHL which have been around 5ever – Fortnite has nothing more than bright colors wacky dances,  and brain melting concepts.

Quick facts :

  • the graphics are weak – especially with a 4k system because  there are so many games where the graphics and experience are so much better
  • the building mode is overrated – and Call of Duty did it better
  • the dances are lame – and yet people live for them???
  • and don’t get me started on how my friend (while playing with his girlfriend) pushed her around in a shopping cart and then threw her off a cliff… talk about #relationshipgoals?

So when will Fortnite go nighty night… I don’t know but I sure hope it doesn’t last much longer because I am pretty sick and tired of hearing about it. pexels-photo

Welcome Home

Could a phrase mean more than just that?

(First off, i would like to thank Kenney, Shannon, and Campus Ministry for allowing me to experience Nazareth Farm, now on with the regularly scheduled blog post)

We commonly hear it during the times after a long vacation, or coming home from college, or even in sarcasm (Yup that is my mom alright). But what it could mean to a select few, means an experience unlike any other?

In Early 2018, a group i was very fortunate to Co-advise for an Alternative Winter Break to Nazareth Farms ,West Virginia. (Yes, i already know as I said this you are looking up John Denver’s hit song ” Take Me Home, Country Roads” I mean its a jam anyways.) The Alternative Break was designed to give back to communities within the Appalachian mountain region of West Virginia. Sounds straight forward right? Seems like a 2-D Service Trip through a service site?

Wrong…

Nazareth Farms was one of the best sites for service i think students can go to. First off, the staff is one of the most welcoming you’ll ever meet. Basically right when you get off the van you are greeted with a hug and “Welcome Home”. You do not know this person or this place (especially if you get in at 8 pm and in the dark like we did) and they welcome you home like a long lost family member. It is interesting to say the least. You find out as you get there that other schools alternative break programs and your instant thought is ” Oh, well i guess then i may just introduce myself to the them then ill stay with my group.”

Wrong again.

Instantly you just start talking with the different student and staff members and find similarities that start long conversations that last well into the timeless night. Oh yeah time, forget it, you do not need it when your down here, or phones, or any technology for that matter. You are enjoying yourself so much that you do not need this stuff. (Also there isn’t any WIFI but that is beside the point.) The experience of staying up late, talking, playing guitar and singing along. Its one of the greatest times i think a student can have during their down time.

The work you do with Nazareth Farms is unbelievable, you do so much in such little time with such diversity of tasks. One day you may be ripping down old dry wall and setting up new stuff, you may be painting, you may even do minor electrical work, or you could be cleaning Nazareth Farms and preparing the meal for the night. Its such a different way to give back than i have ever seen. Its really rewarding that although the families that may have been less fortunate, they are appreciative and always believe they are more fortunate with Nazareth Farms around and when students and staff like us take time that we could be spending with our loved ones after the holidays and spend it giving back to the community that was not our own.

For those who have gone to down to “NAZ Farm” its one of the best experiences we got to have within the realm of service. The loving nature of the staff and crew to the people who help serve the community to the families we work with. Everything seemed magical during this time and it really created a sense of bonding both between the individual school and the community as a whole group. I think everyone would agree that the hardest thing is leaving this great place and going back to ordinary life. What the Farm teaches you is that everyone has to “come down the mountain” or end their experience at one point or another, but they are always welcomed to “Come Home.” I think this was one of the best wrap ups to the week of service i have ever seen. The idea of you have to go but you can always come back is one of the best send off messages i have ever received on a service trip. It is one that will stay with a lot of us for a while.

West Virginia_1

The picture above shows a group of students that made me stay within Higher Education. When i accepted the opportunity to Co- Advise on this service trip, i had a lot of questions that i needed answered for myself. Am i a good leader?, Am i someone who people will follow, Am i respected, the list goes on and on. Basically i viewed this trip as a gut check so to speak. I figured i am so high strung about the future that i needed a test.

THIS WAS A SELF-PROCTORED EXAM

What i felt at the beginning was anxiety that i was not a good leader that i was some what doomed to fail. Nazareth Farms was the turning point for me. I can remember during a time where i was the driver of the van, that i was in control and the people within the van trusted me to drive the van safely. That meant the world to me. People trusted me to get something done. Then as we left the farm, i drove all the way from West Virginia to North Andover MA with everyone trusting me to get them home safely, I considered this the passing of my own test, and it was all in relation to the Farm. Even today i start my staff meetings with ” Its Good to Be Here” “Its great to be here” Shout Out. (You know the call 🙂 )

 

Nazareth Farms, it is home to me and so many others because of what it can do for a person. It can re invigorate you to continue the great work you already do, it can create new thoughts and ideas, or can change you to be a better person in a world where you can make a difference even if its just a day of honest work. Service trips are designed for students and others alike to get the taste of what its like giving back without really feeling the presence of the work they do. Nazareth Farms Brings a community to surround you, welcome you, and to add to your own sense of belonging both in a wider range of the community and within the Nazareth Farms community. I do not think you can get service trip like this very often. If you have the opportunity to visit please accept the moment you are able to,  you will never regret going.

Even after so many months away, As i sit here writing this i can not help and think of Nazareth Farms and what it as able to do for both me and everyone else who was able to attend this wonderful place so thank you to the great staff that runs this place day in and day out.

SO to those who have been and those who will go

Welcome Home 26814895_565130677155706_5042406003603574494_n

 

“She was Asking For It”

Don’t call me gluten-free – call me a glutton for punishment

Sometimes I catch myself wondering if I was asking for it. If me passing out tired and drunk in his bed on Halloween, or me blackout drunk and naked in my own was something I wanted.

At least that is what I tell myself. After all, I did go back for more…, right?

Confession: I am guilty of being skeptical when some others come forward – I know the signs of rape, I know how women or men feel after it happens. And while we cannot make blanket statements or stereotypes I know every case is not the same – that does not make me any less skeptical of situations that don’t add up.

People tend to think sexual assault is a cut and dry case – it isn’t. And I only learned that because, while sitting in a social justice class I learned the definition of sexual assault. It reads :

but sexual assault could also pertain to the Wikipedia definition :

Sexual assault is an act in which a person sexually touches another person without that person’s consent, or coerces or physically forces a person to engage in a sexual act against their will.[1] It is a form of sexual violence which includes rape (forced vaginal, anal or oral penetration or drug facilitated sexual assault), gropingchild sexual abuse or the torture of the person in a sexual manner

In my life, there have been two or more occasions where I have fit one or both of the definitions above. Shocking, however, was the thought that I had no idea that what I had been through and how I felt when I woke up was normal of someone who had been taken advantage of.

I was 19 when it happened – and waking up the next morning shuffling out of that room walking back to my own at six o’clock in the morning wearing all black from the night before. I remember I had everything with me but my mask – and yet there was nothing I wanted to do more than hiding my face as the maintenance workers drove by – because it wasn’t what it looked like – it wasn’t a true walk of shame… but it also felt a lot worse than it was.

Flash forward two years to the first time I was truly intimate after that occasion and I was blackout drunk and found myself saying yes. But that doesn’t mean I wanted it – because even today I don’t remember getting home, getting in bed, in fact, I don’t remember anything other than that one. little. word. yes. and then the sounds that followed.

And to be honest I still grapple with that choice because no matter how high I felt when I woke up – there are days now where I feel empty and wonder if making the choice I did while I was drunk – was one I would have stuck with sober.

So why this – why now?

Well, I could ask the same. Why Kavanaugh, why Cosby, why do we keep making exceptions – why do we have to ask why Dr. Ford didn’t come forward sooner? Why are we suddenly sensitive? and why does it take so many women crying over the same name to make something happen?

Why is Alcohol or Misplaced Masculinity an Excuse and “She Was Asking For It” A Just Answer???  And Why is His Word Worth More Than Hers in a Court of Law When the Constitution Specifically Reads “WE THE PEOPLE OF THE UNITED…”????

Look… at the end of the day I can’t blame anyone but myself for putting myself in the situations I was in. I refuse to be a victim and so I hold myself accountable… but I wasn’t asking for it. I was just trying to give someone else what they wanted because I thought it would make them like me…

I did what I did for my own personal reasons and no matter how bad it looks on paper – no matter how it fits the definition or how I define it – or what I see and hear in my nightmares… all that matters is that I am ok.

But some women aren’t – some live with what happened to them for the rest of their lives – afraid to speak up because even if the constitution says WE THE PEOPLE it doesn’t account for their life liberty and pursuit of happiness.

These days we need to stop claiming that she was asking for it… we need to stop letting “boys be boys” and we need to start holding ourselves accountable for our sins and digressions (right Judge Kavanaugh?) because if we don’t – the only thing SHE WILL BE ASKING FOR – IS JUSTICE 

 

An Open Letter to the Service Industry

To the guy who denied my friend a seat in his restaurant because of an allergy…. really? To the woman at the coffee shop drive-through who yelled at my friend when she ordered a hand full of things for a full car of middle schoolers, are you serious?

This summer I have heard more horror stories than ever before. and as an advocate for my friends, I can’t stay silent even if I also understand the other side.

For years I worked on a line at a local burrito shop. We had good customers and bad ones. We had people who cared and people who cursed. We had people who cheated for a quick discount and we had people who paid more than expected to give us a nice tip at the end of the night. That being said, anyone working in the service industry I salute you and thank you for the incredible work you do [mostly without thanks].

But on the other hand, that does not give you the right to take it out on your customer.

SO … while I understand the risks and liabilities of allergies in a food-based business, so do the owners, and as such it is their job to make the proper steps toward the safety of their patrons.

It is never right to attack or verbally assault a customer that has not done harm – it is not a business right to disclose a customers information, to kick them out or use profanities in the presence of children.

So as an open letter to the service industry – it’s not where you eat – its who you meet and sometimes that can make all the difference for your day.

 

 

Up in Smoke

In too many drinks, deeper and deeper i tread

The room becomes pressurized with the flow of alcohol fueled, anxiety driven young people.

I cant stand the choking, the haze that i am in

I push my way out of the crowd as if hiding in plain sight

That wasn’t my scene,  no director was telling me to restart that one.

As i walk towards the dimly lit bench hidden by a hill

I open up my package of cigarettes,

Flick open the old lighter that my grandfather gave me

The one that saw so many tragedies

It has a scar that runs from the top of the lighter all the way down its spine

You need to turn the flint a couple of times for it to light

A lights so warm you forget of the troubles

I guess it takes after its owners.

The tobacco touches the tip of the torch,

And the crackle of the chemicals cringes my lungs

but its how i breath,

its how i fly

I know this is how i end up in the ground unannounced

But the smoke clears my mind, relieves what i can not hold in

Maybe in a cloud of uncertainty, 

With the booze bringing in the nightmares

i am just trying to smoke them out.

 

 

 

Five Categories Netflix Should Add ASAP

  • Lonely, Horny and Desperate – aka when Rom Com’s aren’t enough but ‘unrated’ movies are too much and too crude for you to handle. this genre could feature
    • underrated as well as up and coming heartthrobs
    • scandals
    • romance
    • and anything that would spice up a lonely night in with a bottle of wine
  • DCOMS – because everyone needs to know what Disney Channel Original Movies are… Hello Zenon? Johnny Kapahala? Raven Simone? Where Y’all At?
    • *extra points to any reader or follower who can name their top five * in the comments below
  • Random for you – a list specifically made for the most indecisive people in the world – spin a wheel and decide what you are watching tonight! (because the number of times I have asked Google or Siri what I want to watch is out of control.)
    • roll a die pick a card – I don’t care just put something on!=
  • Movies Hulu and Amazon don’t have – not just Netflix originals
    • the number of times I have gone through all three sites to find the same damn choices is ridiculous. I am glad you all use the same algorithm but give me some variety!
  • Movies that will convince Baby Boomers you are more Cultured than the Average Millenial
    • classics like ‘Scarface’ ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ ‘Grease’ the original ‘Footloose’ with Kevin Bacon? or even silent movies or Hitchcock (I am talking good cinema people!!)

 

BONUS IDEA!

  • Netflix and Chill 
    • movies and shows to mindlessly watch or not watch… and enjoy for hours on end

 

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Do you have any categories you would like to see? Comment and share your favorites below!

couples who work out together

couples who work out together

I won’t lie, I am jealous of those staged videos [you know the ones]. Where a couple [generally a male and female] are getting fit together and barely look like they are breaking a sweat. THIS IS NOT REALISTIC.
Often times I will be scrolling through my social accounts and these videos will pop up. I immediately am overcome with jealousy because [wow] and because I would love to find a man like this, but again. It is not realistic.
To the couples that do this, I have no doubt that you share a special kind of bond, but as for the rest of us… when you see me running just look the other way because it will not be pretty.

I wish I Had Known

If I had known what was going wrong,

I would have been there

 

If I had seen what you were feeling,

the winds around would have spun me a tornado strong enough to save you

and I would have taken a whole barn out of its place to find you, comfort you.

 

These days I am more angry than sad

No longer able to stand knowing what happens to good people.

But Of course, I am late to the funeral, And it seems to be a trend.

And God! it burns a hole in my head!

Because I would have done something, anything,

If only

And I wish I knew how you are feeling, even though I’ll never comprehend it

And I wish I knew what goes on in your thoughts when the darkness seeps neath closed doors and windows,

And even if you do not want it –

I will try to hold a candle out for you to take. To burn away what hate hath break –

 

You see

When the time comes I just hope someone can hold me back

And tie me up in the thickest of chains,

For if this ever happens to someone I care about, I will hunt them till the ends of the earth

 

And you may pray that an Earthly force will hold me back.

But Even I doubt that.

 

Now I can take some sort of stand to amend for my sins

Even though they do not stain my own soul.

 

 

May God have my back,

May you have my reason

May I never again not know 

How you are Doing.